eglantiere (
eglantiere) wrote in
concrit_x2021-04-09 10:42 pm
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Concrit for egelantier
I want to receive feedback by: Comments on the published fics are the best, but if you prefer to be more private, the mods have my email, and my discord handle is egelantier#0472.
Here are the works I want feedback on: anything on
egelantier is good to go!
There are several recent fics that are out of my usual wheelhouse and so I'd be very interested in feedback on them, but honestly anything goes, regardless of posting year:
give us a little love (TGE, Maia/Csethiro arranged marriage canon divergence AU)
create in me a clean heart (VME, fairly graphic hurt/comfort fic with crucifixion)
the rivers of the sky are dry (Narnia, ensemble)
lead me down to the dusty garden (FFXV, fairly graphic whump)
I have these questions for readers:
- If somebody's read my earlier fics, I would really love to know if there's a visible change/progress in my writing over the years.
- The other question I'm burningly curious about is whether the stories in different fandoms feel samey because my writing 'voice' - the cadence, the word choices, et cetera - overwhelms setting/characterization differences.
- Is there a stylistic quirk / repeated pattern that feels really visible to you, in an inorganic way?
The style of feedback I prefer to receive is: Pretty much everything goes, including SPAG and stylistic, sentence-by-sentence feedback. I'm ESL, and I would be grateful for any comments here (I'm endlessly beholden to my betas for saving the readers from the worst of my comma and semicolon sins before they see the light of the day, but...).
It's fine to be blunt as long as there's an elaboration on what didn't/did work for you.
Comments to this post will be: unscreened
Here are the works I want feedback on: anything on
There are several recent fics that are out of my usual wheelhouse and so I'd be very interested in feedback on them, but honestly anything goes, regardless of posting year:
give us a little love (TGE, Maia/Csethiro arranged marriage canon divergence AU)
create in me a clean heart (VME, fairly graphic hurt/comfort fic with crucifixion)
the rivers of the sky are dry (Narnia, ensemble)
lead me down to the dusty garden (FFXV, fairly graphic whump)
I have these questions for readers:
- If somebody's read my earlier fics, I would really love to know if there's a visible change/progress in my writing over the years.
- The other question I'm burningly curious about is whether the stories in different fandoms feel samey because my writing 'voice' - the cadence, the word choices, et cetera - overwhelms setting/characterization differences.
- Is there a stylistic quirk / repeated pattern that feels really visible to you, in an inorganic way?
The style of feedback I prefer to receive is: Pretty much everything goes, including SPAG and stylistic, sentence-by-sentence feedback. I'm ESL, and I would be grateful for any comments here (I'm endlessly beholden to my betas for saving the readers from the worst of my comma and semicolon sins before they see the light of the day, but...).
It's fine to be blunt as long as there's an elaboration on what didn't/did work for you.
Comments to this post will be: unscreened
Re: create in me a clean heart
i'm going to to meditate a lot over all those commas, and i have a separate grammar question crying for your help in the discord; there's a handful of stuff that are mostly canon-compliant because VME is a crazy place (lauren is a teenager genius hacker who's chained up in the vatican basement, he's that much of a dramatic asshole and also he's obsessed with hiraga and would like roberto to drop down into the well; they usually investigate miracles like crying statues and (cocaine) visions, but i don't remember if they actually audited a real saint; the talk about miracles is the show tagline and a bit of Anime Catholicism; Roberto IS that bad with his self-esteem. also i could've sworn i lifted 'unexplainable and durable' out of the article on vatican-approved miraculous healings, but i'm googling now and i can't find it, so it's possible it was all a dream.)
the thing i really, really love about your concrit, and that i'm going to really think about is that you notice a handful of shortcuts i use (or invent and use) for covering up either things i do badly or the things i'm not interested in doing (like baby artists painting people with their hands behind their back), and all the bits where generalities paper over the specifics, because sometimes i do it without thinking, or because i'm caught up in a certain... there's a very seductive cadence to cliches in english, you know? to my ear, anyway. and there's a certain amount of cost/benefit to me in writing fic, where sometimes i think 'yes i can expand but it's not worth it', but i'm also circling my poor zinnia and sparrow, trying to screw my courage together to make them into a coherent, no excuses story, and this is where i need to avoid, you know. all of this. paint the hands and the folds and fill in the background and everything. so! yes. and yes.
(and i always incredibly value when you put down the distinction between 'this works for me' and 'this doesn't work for me but works for h/c' and 'this doesn't work at all', it's ssssso good and right, and it always makes me think, even when i ultimately disagree. the best posible crit.)
thank you so, so much ♥