Concrit for perverse_idyll
Aug. 7th, 2020 08:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
perverse_idyll posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
concrit_xI want to receive feedback by: Comment on my post here or email at perverseidyll1956@gmail.com
Here are the works I want feedback on: The Blood of Stars (approximate 10K word cut-off is in Chapter 2, the sentence "Merlin, he doesn't want to go in there.")
Impossible Without It (approximate 10K word cut-off is in Chapter 2, the sentence "Inquiries? About what?" Harry said, bewildered.)
I'll leave it up to the reader to decide how much of the proposed sections they decide to review.
ETA: If neither of those is a good fit for you, I'd be interested in concrit for Soft Touch, Warm, Elegy for a Goat, The Lost World, or In Infinite Remorse of Soul. My works on AO3
My works' fandoms and content notes are: Harry Potter fandom, Severus Snape/Harry Potter. No explicit content within the 10K excerpts themselves, although Blood of Stars gets sexually explicit further on and includes a noncon kiss between a 17-year-old and a 38-year-old. Blood of Stars is in Snape's 3rd-person POV, later Harry's 1st-person POV. Impossible Without It is Harry's 3rd-person POV. Blood of Stars is more heavily descriptive, Impossible Without It is an attempt to be more straightforward.
I have these questions for readers: Characterization and style are always important to me, so I'm happy to hear what readers think. Blood of Stars is the first time I've written a Snape POV so I suppose one question would be, how well do I pull it off? Also for Blood of Stars: is the opening too confusing? I don't outline, so I can sometimes use help with pacing. Questions of clarity or general reader investment also matter. Since both stories are still in the early stages, you won't be able to comment on the narrative arc, but any observations on the speed, continuity, and structure of what's there is welcome. Frankly, all feedback is welcome.
I would prefer gentle (5) or direct (1) feedback, or something in between: I'm fine with all levels as long as the feedback is offered with respect.
Comments are unscreened.
Here are the works I want feedback on: The Blood of Stars (approximate 10K word cut-off is in Chapter 2, the sentence "Merlin, he doesn't want to go in there.")
Impossible Without It (approximate 10K word cut-off is in Chapter 2, the sentence "Inquiries? About what?" Harry said, bewildered.)
I'll leave it up to the reader to decide how much of the proposed sections they decide to review.
ETA: If neither of those is a good fit for you, I'd be interested in concrit for Soft Touch, Warm, Elegy for a Goat, The Lost World, or In Infinite Remorse of Soul. My works on AO3
My works' fandoms and content notes are: Harry Potter fandom, Severus Snape/Harry Potter. No explicit content within the 10K excerpts themselves, although Blood of Stars gets sexually explicit further on and includes a noncon kiss between a 17-year-old and a 38-year-old. Blood of Stars is in Snape's 3rd-person POV, later Harry's 1st-person POV. Impossible Without It is Harry's 3rd-person POV. Blood of Stars is more heavily descriptive, Impossible Without It is an attempt to be more straightforward.
I have these questions for readers: Characterization and style are always important to me, so I'm happy to hear what readers think. Blood of Stars is the first time I've written a Snape POV so I suppose one question would be, how well do I pull it off? Also for Blood of Stars: is the opening too confusing? I don't outline, so I can sometimes use help with pacing. Questions of clarity or general reader investment also matter. Since both stories are still in the early stages, you won't be able to comment on the narrative arc, but any observations on the speed, continuity, and structure of what's there is welcome. Frankly, all feedback is welcome.
I would prefer gentle (5) or direct (1) feedback, or something in between: I'm fine with all levels as long as the feedback is offered with respect.
Comments are unscreened.
