It was the right amount of concrit, and it makes me want to go edit both of these right now. :D
I appreciated your points of how to increase the hot factor - more mental images, less clinical vocabulary, avoiding silliness - next fic I will definitely add these points in. And pronoun trouble! I notice it in others' fics and I can't believe I messed it up here so much. Will make sure to focus on that for a while!
Thanks so much for your concrit. I have a lot to ponder and work on.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2020-08-18 06:26 am (UTC)I appreciated your points of how to increase the hot factor - more mental images, less clinical vocabulary, avoiding silliness - next fic I will definitely add these points in. And pronoun trouble! I notice it in others' fics and I can't believe I messed it up here so much. Will make sure to focus on that for a while!
Thanks so much for your concrit. I have a lot to ponder and work on.